tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16071689241274564032024-03-13T02:46:26.075-07:00diablahgstern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.comBlogger201125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-12972963974104737512010-08-17T08:53:00.000-07:002010-08-17T08:54:42.913-07:00mother/baby day 2hi.<br />
<div style="color: #999999;">hi.</div>do we get any visitors today?<br />
<div style="color: #999999;">yeah. we'll come see you.</div>k. cuz we're still <a href="http://warmlittleblog.blogspot.com/" target="_new">HERE</a>.stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-62114617768243594532010-07-19T11:14:00.000-07:002010-07-19T11:17:09.622-07:00The Mundy Morning Blues Band<span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 255, 255);">Aww, someone's got a case of the Mondays...<br /><br />...Cuz it's Monday.</span></span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">That's not very funny.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 255, 255);">No. It's not... That's what makes it funny.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-23465305054429629532010-06-23T09:32:00.000-07:002010-06-23T10:43:47.381-07:00USA-Algeria<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">57'</span><br />w: i hate soccer<br />h: it's so mean<br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">91'</span><br />w: i think i'm going to cry<br />h: i almost passed out. still might<br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">FT</span><br />h: i'm using your labor playlist to settle down<br />w: i've had 3 contractions in the last 15 minutesstern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-977465860111490162010-06-14T09:13:00.000-07:002010-06-14T09:15:50.244-07:00variation on a themePlease bless us with the moisture we need in our skin to keep us from feeling so itchy.stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-65763308085440326482010-03-22T13:32:00.000-07:002010-03-22T13:35:07.862-07:00maternal words of wisdom<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">• Your personality is not conducive to having a child.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">• What?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">• A baby is unpredictable from the time it's conceived 'til the day that you die.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-27057572142087001252010-01-29T09:47:00.000-08:002010-01-29T09:53:18.219-08:00sister carmen<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Now you can give those names to Sister Carmen.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">I never see Sister Carmen anymore.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Oh yeah, because you're a nurser.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">Yeah, I'm in the nursery all day.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Why aren't nurses called nursers? </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Nurse</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);"> is something you do; not something you are.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">Yep. Nursers nurse in the nursery.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Exactly. Just like nunners nun in the nunnery.<br /></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);"> Ha. Nunners...</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-6430939864600164542010-01-25T08:53:00.001-08:002010-01-25T08:54:55.027-08:00good question</br><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);"><br />what was that?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 255);">a raisin.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">why did you put it in my mouth?</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-8125037772110542682010-01-21T14:35:00.000-08:002010-01-21T14:45:28.035-08:00the manta ray diet<span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">- Then there was that one episode where we found out that fish don't just have sex like humans.</span><br />- Yeah, they just release a cloud of one thing and a cloud of another, and hope they cloud together.<br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">- And then the manta rays swoop in and eat it all.</span><br />- Mantas are gross.<br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">- Manta rays eat fish sex for breakfast.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-15297881533941647422010-01-12T08:17:00.000-08:002010-01-12T08:18:49.593-08:00Day After DayGood morning sharp shooter.<br />Good morning deadeye dick.<br /><br />Good morning Tony the Tiger.<br />Good morning Toucan Sam.<br /><br />Good morning Captain America.<br />Good morning Mount Rushmore.stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-70677492388213860862009-11-04T15:30:00.000-08:002009-11-04T15:35:34.108-08:00full circle with the lip tissue<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 102);font-family:courier new;" >» Lips are weird. They're skin, but they're not normal skin.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 102);font-family:arial;" >« Yeah, true. They're half in your mouth and half on your face.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 102);font-family:courier new;" >» Outside skin is all dry and lives on land, while the rest of your organ tissue basically lives under water.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 102);font-family:arial;" >« If outside skin is land creatures and inside tissue is underwater breathers, then lips are... amphibians.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 102);font-family:courier new;" >» And amphibians are weird.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-14610036002754185162009-10-13T09:40:00.000-07:002009-10-13T09:41:21.763-07:00prayer one-linerI'm thankful to be leaving a clean house for a good job on a nice day.stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-74543694814153451532009-10-06T10:52:00.000-07:002009-10-06T10:56:04.767-07:001 Nephi 11:21–23 (and the most joyous)<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 51);">1. Knowest thou the meaning of the tree which thy father saw?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 51);">2. Yea, it is the love of God, which sheddeth itself abroad in the hearts of the children of men; wherefore, it is the most desirable above all things.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 51);">3. Yea, and the most joyous to the soul.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-37681326261503104912009-08-27T11:21:00.000-07:002009-08-27T11:26:04.137-07:00oh humans. and bands.<span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 0);font-family:courier new;" >• I tried to like them, but it never worked for me. But I tried so hard, because they had street-cred.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(192, 192, 192);font-family:courier new;" >• It</span><span style="color: rgb(192, 192, 192);font-family:courier new;" >’</span><span style="color: rgb(192, 192, 192);font-family:courier new;" >s funny once you realize you’ve put way too much effort into trying to like a band.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 0);font-family:courier new;" >• Yeah. I have done it many times. You try so hard because it seems like you SHOULD like them. When it’s something that is so trivial. If you don’t like a band when you first hear them, why on earth would you keep trying? Like it’s a chore?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(192, 192, 192);font-family:courier new;" >• Yeah. It is a mission you must accomplish. Or else you are a failure.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-36794913606146130222009-08-22T14:09:00.000-07:002009-08-22T14:25:40.728-07:00touché, fiancée<span style="color: rgb(204, 255, 255);">• How are you, Natalie?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">• Good. How are you... ummm...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 255, 255);">• You forgot my name?!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">• And you forgot mine. It's Crystal.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-75701487207064935502009-08-07T13:58:00.000-07:002009-08-07T14:01:05.890-07:00r.i.p. fresh basil<span style="font-family: courier new; color: rgb(51, 204, 0);">Though it may be dead and tossed over the fence now, thanks so much for the gift of fresh basil. It has been so delicious.</span><br /><span style="font-family: arial; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Dead and tossed over the fence?!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 204, 0);font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-family: courier new;">Nature at its finest. And cruelest.</span></span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-22919408300627291552009-08-07T13:55:00.000-07:002009-08-07T14:03:43.679-07:00almost invitations<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">I'm starting to think a complete address list of 500 will be the most glorious sight I've ever beheld.</span><br />I second that motion.<br />...<br />Got an address.<br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">Yes! Put it on the list!</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-75491156083123483222009-08-07T13:49:00.000-07:002009-08-07T13:52:28.814-07:00moon! moon!<a style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);" href="https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=26274883&postID=7454235726367567332&isPopup=true" target="_new">Coolest moon in the west.</a><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">I don't see it!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">But it's so cool! It's kinda low...</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">I see it! And whoa! Whoa... Arabian nights.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-22747412698076439882009-07-23T09:31:00.000-07:002009-07-23T09:36:04.995-07:00lots of locusts. anyone else?<span style="color: rgb(204, 204, 204);">When I walked out of my home a rather large grasshopper jumped over my shoulder—I heard a micro-metallic bang—and the grasshopper came plummeting back over my shoulder and slid across the sidewalk. It was grasshopper antics at their finest.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 255, 255);">Since when did they become so lively?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 0);">2009: The year of Clint & Cassie. I get the feeling it's their way of celebrating.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-59065852251620723792009-07-23T09:16:00.000-07:002009-07-23T09:30:06.519-07:00can you confirm or deny the time?<span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">• Did you ever find out anything about the </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">meridiem</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);"> fiasco?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">• My best resources intimate that </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">post meridiem</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> is technically correct—but nothing just wants to tell us straight-up. </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">The Chicago Manual of Style</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> mentions </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">post meridiem</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">, but says nothing about </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">post meridian</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> at all, for example.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">• So </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">post meridiem</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);"> is most correct and there is no </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">post meridian</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">• I am satisfied that </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">meridian</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> only exists on its own (as a noun) and </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">meridiem</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> only exists with a prefix, </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">ante</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> or </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">post</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">, (as an adjective).</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-59641707530749177392009-06-10T14:29:00.000-07:002009-06-19T12:49:02.388-07:00what? no. oh eww.<span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 255);">What has become of you sir?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 0);">Tore my right calf in an ultimate frisbee game. SNAP! But it's almost better.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 255);">You should try to injure yourself above the waist for a change. At any rate, I wish you a speedy recovery.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 0);">True! Maybe I can recruit a cute lady to cause a little lip trauma :P</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-49380082618342214492009-05-22T09:52:00.001-07:002009-05-22T09:55:23.557-07:00girl power<span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);font-family:courier new;" >You did some impressive things in my dream last night, including a quadruple backflip from the pulpit landing in a seated position on a pew — amidst a full congregation no less!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 102);font-family:courier new;" >Whoa. That is pretty impressive. It's all because I talked to that girl.</span></span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-18256924953714069362009-05-15T14:53:00.000-07:002009-05-15T15:03:34.540-07:00i was taught to call them pissants<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">I've got ants in my plants!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">In the basil?!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Yes! Ants!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">What do we do?!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">I don't know. For now I have removed the pot from the windowsill and placed it in a presumably ant-proof zone.</span><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7n2h1qRbBTI&feature=PlayList&p=B66E62C9778F64AB&index=1" target="_new">How did ants get 2 floors up and find that basil</a><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">? Are there ants anywhere else in your house?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Never been ants here before.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">Oh dear... do you think we will have to get rid of the plant or maybe trans</span><strong style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">plant</strong><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);"> it to another location outside?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">I just don't know anymore... It's getting so big and anty that it will almost certainly require a plan of action soon.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-7900666586329891052009-05-06T14:05:00.000-07:002009-05-06T14:08:15.751-07:00click text below to follow my latest life<a href="http://cincodemoustache.blogspot.com/" target="_new">Do you still have a mustache?<br />I woke up and it was gone!</a>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-69639197596614052562009-04-08T13:58:00.001-07:002009-04-08T14:02:15.374-07:00which would also explain the amplification<span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 153);">Why do people put a fist in front of their mouth when coughing? It does nothing!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Only if they pucker their lips into their fist will it work.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 153);">This lady, one of the SEOs I hate, has been coughing WAY too loud, so I was spying and seeing what she was doing wrong, and it's that she is coughing onto a fist that she holds about 6 inches in front of her mouth.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Like she's holding an imaginary microphone to cough into?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 153);">Exactly.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1607168924127456403.post-27173092692327712172009-04-07T14:31:00.000-07:002009-04-07T14:33:16.108-07:00this isn't rocket science<span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">So, help me out here. What's the opposite of rocket science?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">Like, actual rocket science, or the term </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204); font-weight: bold;">rocket science</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">?</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">Well, the term, but I think you have to go somewhat literal to figure it out.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">[conversation too long and twisty </span><em style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);">and funny</em><span style="color: rgb(153, 255, 153);"> to duplicate here]</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">...So </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153); font-weight: bold;">crudely drawn buffalo</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);"> is the opposite of </span><em style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">rocket science</em><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">!</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 204);">Yeah! Rocket science is the discipline of launching people and objects away from earth and it is only possible to the most advanced minds.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 255, 153);">And crudely drawn buffalo is painted on the wall of a cave, within the earth, by the most degenerate mind.</span>stern mister serioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09006131785836492963noreply@blogger.com2