Short Triablahg

Hey Rachel, This is Glen.

• Hi Glen, nice to meet you.
• Nice to meet you too, Rachel.
• So, you're the new guy?
• Yeah.
• Did you steal my chair?

Q&A is more like it.

"Is that Travis's little playground?"
"No."

DAY14

+ If I could stop bleeding! Wait, what did you say?
+ Would you please take a bath?
+ Yeah, if I could stop bleeding! A bath will do me no good.
+ You wouldn't smell like an over-handled trophy.
+ Well when I'm bled to empty death you can taxiderm me into a trophy! And over-handle me!
+ Maybe if you go to sleep it will stop.
+ Really?
+ Yeah, your heart stops when you sleep. Plus you don't yell when you're asleep. Or stink as much.
+ Well the full moon is too bright for sleep.
+ But not too bright to smell like a trophy.

No high peepee for you, my boy.

™ Mel's so fat he can't even give your portfolio an A.
™ That’s not a joke, just true. Did you get an A?
™ No way. Who knows what I got. I think a B-.
™ And you still love Mel . . .
™ I didn't exactly go about earning high peepee scores last semester.
™ I'm sorry, what? High peepee scores?
™ Sorry. I'm laughing at myself. I don't know why, but that's the word that seemed like it deserved to go there. No real reason I guess.
™ Well, ok. No high peepee for you, my boy. None at all.
™ I love this— I'm sorry, what? High peepee scores?

Liaise

: I just thought the word harangue. And then the word liaise. Spellcheck those.
: I actually was doing harangue when you demanded that. It's right. And liaise is right too. And weird. I don't really like it.
: What?? I love it.
: Liaise? Use it.
: (I hate liaison)
: (me too)
: I'm going to liaise with Nick later at our house.
: I'm not convinced.
: We'll liaise about our days.
: Liaisey daze.
: sick.
: You're the one who likes it.

Death Dealer

: What about your covert, riotous love life? If that's what it is . . .
. I've put it to rest . . . Emma won't talk to me anymore, and I don't want to deal with drama.
: The only dealing with drama you should do is dealing death to it.

Asymmetrical Hair

: you doing anything above and beyond boring tonight?
: nah. you?
: well. if I'm mad enough at it—cut my hair off.
: do you always cut your own hair?
: for a while now. mostly I just buzz it, but maybe I'll try something different. something hip.
: hip is good. i saw my first real-life asymmetrical haircut yesterday at church.
: intentional? hip?
: i loved it. i would never do it. but i loved it.
: I don't even know how to imagine it.
: i can get you a visual.
: that would help.
: you can kind of see the hair in this picture. it looks better now but that's the idea.
: ha. looks like a cocker spaniel with a short ear and a long ear.
: haha. yes it does.
: it's too crazy. It seems like something's wrong. with the health of the person. like they had to get one side short so that doctors could do surgery on their brain.
: i hear you learn all about that in neuroscience school.
: yeah. Which haircuts to give.
: and which to get.

Pegasus

: hi. what are you up to?
: the least i've ever been up to.

Nimble Little Line Rider

» i just got a backflip. first ever
— and I got a full front flip
» yeah!
— congrats, by the way
» thanks
— I made line rider do the splits just now
» ha. nimble little line rider
— haha
» i just got splits too! i had no idea they'd make me so happy
— have you tried loop de loop yet?
» whoa. no
— well. I've been trying. I got him in the loop and around it, but then he's trapped inside
» oh dear. oh yes. he is trapped
— Mr. Line Rider is very brave
» he really is. and loyal. he'd ride any line for you. he rides the line
— ha. That's what he does. He's made up his mind

Peers are Priceless

*Peers are priceless.
»They are good.
*Priceless.
»What about when someone is peerless? That's a good thing, right?
*Yeah. It's supposed to be. They have no peer.
»What's a peer?
*Um. Isn't it basically an equal?
»Yeah. Kind of like an age equal.
*Ha. When someone's peerless they have no one the same age.
»Ha. I guess different kinds of equal not just age.
*But mostly age. Those are the priceless ones. It sucks to have no one the same age.
»Yeah. If you are peerless you turn out weird like a kid who acts like a dad.
*That's why peers are priceless.

Picture a dog

*i saw an awesome thing this morning
*I wanna see
*picture a dog waiting for a "walk" signal and then crossing the crosswalk. seriously
*ha. big or little?
*medium, black, nice looking
*One of Pavlov's probably. a grandpa riding his bike with a nice tan pointed right at me when I drove by, and every car after me
*how much apparel was he clad with?
*hmmm. I think he was all farmered with pants and a flannel, but the sleeves were rolled up. and I don't know how many buttons unbuttoned
*awesome. my dad wears flannel all through the summer. why?

Goth Prom

Is Veronica going to goth prom?

should we talk about her?

oh. Uh. I guess that question is the answer no.

nevermind. i just meant that should i give you her beans? maybe it's not a big deal at all. no. or, not a.

It didn't seem like a big deal, just that question, when I asked it.

yes. she is. i'm sorry for the unnecessary reaction.

that's ok I guess. It kind of startled me.

me too.

Sincerity. So light.

» If your specialty were recognizing people's specialties—
« it's cool.
» maybe that'd even be fantastic.
« It would be pretty awesome. Here's why I think: I never know what to talk to people about, but people love talking about their own specialty. So at least I could be more personable.
» Yeah. That's what i was getting at.
« Good girl. Can you believe "good girl" was my idea of a compliment just then?
» No. I'm trying not to believe it.
« Sometimes I'm way wrong like that.
» Yeah. But i know that your wrong is meant as right usually.
« You're so sincere these days. Good girl.
» Ha. Something's gotten into me. Sincerity.
« Don't you think sincerity is refreshing?
» Definitely. So light.

Visual Infant Sucks too much

Visual Infant sucks too mucks.
But you love that about it.
No. I love that it sucks, but not when it sucks too mucks.
Isn't Visual Infant just you anyway?
Yeah. I guess I suck too muck.
You musk ox.
Man, I suck too musk.
Obviously you were going to say that.
Obviously I did. Can I suck two bucks off you?
For what?
King Tut's pink butt.
What?
To buy a burrito.
To munch a 2-buck lunch?
To crunch a bunch of junk.

Moods.

Riding a motorcycle you stole.